The Invasion (part 2)

I remember so vividly the silly grin on the face of each teenager that took me in…into the room and shut the door as his mother laid sleep in the living room, and I lay panty less on a nasty bedroom floor. He played with my soft places until I my innocent body began to react, and feel only things a woman should which made me long to come back. My mother would ask me time and again if anyone ever touched me, she used the word in appropriately so I responded no ‘cause I felt lucky. How was I supposed to know that the games they took turns playing with me were gross and really awful?

 All at once my innocence quickly seemed to escape; when I realized what they were doing to me some would consider rape. When the sister finally came home to spend time with me as she had always promised my mom, she noticed I was headed to her brother’s room and wondered why I sobbed. She asked me why I was going there and I said I always do, she waved her fist, yelling at one brother and said this mess is through. So all the times you asked for me, were you looking the other way, while the brothers you knew were sick spent special time with me each day? Or did the encounter you had with me as you saw me passing by, the very room of your dearest sibling with the look of fresh meat in his eyes?

 Seventeen years later, I saw him and the memories came flooding back. Things I had not thought about since that terrible day. Then I found myself whispering, “I forgive you, if not for you for me”. By the time I made through the checkout line I felt totally free. The evil things you did to my body would no longer take its course; because my heart has been penetrated I can cancel the yoke of divorce. Sure the first one that I tried it failed and I was shame, but this marriage I’m in now is sealed in JESUS’ name!

The Invasion (part 1)

Although I would love to blog every day, unfortunately, HE will not release me to do so for your benefit. You, the reader need fresh downloads from God and expressions of the deepest love that He has for you. I don’t blog because I’m bored. I blog because I have something to say and someone, that only I can say it to. Therefore, as I proceed, please understand that this post will be like no other you have read from my previous thoughts. It will be raw and spoken as my husband Abba releases me to speak.

The Invasion

 A bold statement, hmm? Yeah that’s me. Bold. I refuse to quietly sit by and idly watch life happen to people HE especially loves and adores. So, I made a choice to stand up and out for them, for HIM! At the age of 5 I was allowed to visit the neighbors next door, because the oldest daughter still living at home would ask for me often. My mother fully trusted this family, as she had grown very close to their mother and expected her to protect me with her life. You see I was the daughter my mother asked for and no one would ever hurt her little girl!

 Little did she know that hurt was a norm for me, because those who promised to care were never there as I visited. But the boys were. They paid attention to me, they thought I was cute and wanted a live teddy bear to hold and squeeze while fondling and misusing my innocence. Not knowing the details of how they got me there weekly sometimes daily, I went gleefully because someone older wanted to “play” with me. I had brothers, but to them I was just a nuisance to carry the little sister along didn’t make sense. I cramped their style for they were older than me, but what they didn’t know or care to see was that others were abusing me.